Sex Scenes from the Female Gaze – a.k.a. “The Smut Panel”

By guest blogger Corrina Lawson

When I put together this panel for GeekGirlCon 2014, I had two goals. One was to have a good time. The other was to shine a light on how our society tends to view sex and sexuality from only one perspective.

To those who attended the panel, I hope you had fun. It was awesome to see a packed house. I’d no idea we’d draw that many people to our panel. I laughed when reading the “Pool Boy” letter in preparation for the panel and I thought it illustrated our point well: this is how the stereotypical male gaze views women. (God forbid one should be over 40 and not have a bikini wax.)

But the second goal was more serious. I need to thank the questioner who asked why call it “sex scenes from the female gaze?” because that brings in all sorts of gender assumptions that may or may not be true.

I could lie and say I thought “The Smut Panel” wouldn’t be accepted by the GeekGirlcon organizers but the truth is that when I named the panel, I thought less of how individual men and women view sex and more about how our pop culture, which is predominantly male-dominated, views sex, especially sex for women. Whatever gender we happen to be, we get a steady diet of what female and non-straight-white male sex looks like through the straight white male gaze.

faking-it

What does that look like when that changes? Chris Merrill’s reading of the fabulous scene of not-so-great sex in Faking It by Jennifer Crusie showed exactly how many things women consider during sex. And Sheena’s reading of the erotica fanfic shows how women have a tough time asking for the kind of sex they want and ultimately come alive. Because, it’s hard to overcome the whole “asking for what you want makes you wrong” conditioning.

The day after the panel, someone pointed out to me that our view of female gaze was very straight. I agree, it was, and that’s one thing I’d like to change if we come back next year. I’d like to talk and read some slashfic or LGBT fiction and have a more diverse group of writers. We originally had scheduled two other romance writers, one Latina and one Japanese-American (who were both on the Romance is a Feminist Genre panel in 2013) but they weren’t able to make it this year. Assuming we’re back, because I feel like we only scratched the surface of this topic, I hope they can attend, plus a few others.

Plus, there are so many good smutty scenes to read yet. I didn’t even get to Emma Holly’s BDSM group scene in Menage. (But you should go read it because it’s fabulous erotica).

If you’re interested in my own work, I’ve written one erotica, which does contain two m/f/m sex scenes, as well as more conventional sex, Freya’s Gift. And if you want some good smut fanfic recommendations, speak up in the comments and I’ll ask Sheena for recommendations.

freya's gift cover

Thanks to GeekGirlCon for approving our panel and thanks again for being so welcoming to us smut writers.

All images courtesy of Corrina Lawson.

To read more about this panel, check out this article by panelist Chris Merrill!

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One response to “Sex Scenes from the Female Gaze – a.k.a. “The Smut Panel””

  1. […] about sex, from a more serious standpoint, is my recap of the Sex Scenes From the Female Gaze panel at GeekGirlCon last […]

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